How could you forget?
by PsychoMeows
Summary: Onodera has just told Takano how he feels but he is then hit by a car and forgets everything... Or does he? He remembers everything from his past life. The uke forgets his modern life but remembers his past, the seme remembers his modern but forgets his past. T for now but may change.
1. Chapter 1

**Onodera's P.O.V**

I had woken up in Takano-san's arms that morning, it had become the norm as of late. I had recently told him how I felt after so long of me trying so hard to deny it. I couldn't hide it anymore, my feelings for my first love had become to strong and I finally swallowed my pride and told him the truth.

It had been several months since then and we were now a proper couple, however not much had changed; Takano-san still teased me and gave me a hard time at work, I still tried to get out of being all lovey-dovey with him and tired my best _not_ to go home with him. Of course he always ended up dragging me into his apartment with him, by now it was like it was my home, he was even trying to convince me to more in with him but I felt like I wasn't quite ready for that.

Still everyday Takano-san insisted that I sleep in his apartment and then he'd make me breakfast before he would force me into his car and drive me to work. I was just happy that no one seemed to notice anything yet.

That day Takano-san and I were first into work. Tonight would probably be the first all-nighter of the cycle for most editors depending on if their mangaka got there manuscripts in or not and how much paper work there was to do, so getting in early may make having to stay up all night less likely but I doubted I would be that lucky.

We walked into the office side by side and just when we reached my seat Takano-san grabbed my arm causing me to turn to look at him and then he kissed me, my mouth was open already and he pushed his tongue in, kissing me deeply. Shocked, I pushed him away from me and glared at him. "Not in the office, you idiot! What if someone saw?!" I snapped at him.

He grinned at me and winked. "Don't worry, Onodera, no one's here yet."

"That's not the point! And besides how do you know someone won't walk in suddenly!"

"Really? Don't worry, it was just a little kiss, I doubt anyone will come in, it's pretty unlikely."

I glared at him and was about to shout and explain that it was entirely possible for someone to come in when Kisa came round the corner, proving my point before I even said anything.

"Good morning," Kisa greeted us. Even though it wasn't quite the bad part of the cycle Kisa looked exhausted. He walked slowly and I couldn't help but notice he had a slight limp. He practically fell into his chair.

Takano-san looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "You ok there, Kisa?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine, just had a long night," he said, sleepily. I was a little confused as to why, surly he wasn't doing work last night; it was unlikely his mangaka got their manuscripts done. He seemed to notice my confusion and added quickly with a slight blush on his face; "A friend kept me up last night."

Takano-san didn't look to impressed by that and walked to his own seat telling Kisa that "You shouldn't be up late when the end of the cycle is near, you should know that!"

"Yeah, I know," Kisa muttered, he had already turned on his laptop and was looking though his papers as he waited for it to load. I took his lead and began my work as well.

* * *

As we expected it was going to be an all-nighter and everyone was already half-asleep. Takano-san was beginning to get moodier, Hatori was getting stressed mainly because of 'Yoshikawa Chiharu,' Kisa looked about ready to collapse and Mino was smiling like always. I was buried in papers and the piles were getting bigger and the words on them were beginning to blur, I needed a break soon or I would pass out on the desk...

It was then that Kisa suddenly and loudly announced "I'm going to the coffee shop across the street for some much needed coffee, anyone else want?"

At this everyone quickly replied with a loud; "Yes!"

And Mino added "and some cakes or something!"

Kisa sighed, clearly not expecting such a large group to say yes to his suggestion, feeling bad for him and in desperate need of a break, I spoke up. "Kisa-san if you'd like I can go with you to help carry the coffee and cakes back?"

Kisa smiled at me "sure, thank you, Ricchan!"

We stood up, grabbed our coats and began to leave, Takano-san called out to us just before we left, "don't take too long! We have a lot of work to do!"

We nodded and left, walking as fast as we could so we could get back to work quickly.

Once we were away and nearing the elevator to leave the building Kisa spoke to me in his normal teasing tone. "So Ricchan, you seem happier than normal these past few months, things going well with you're girlfriend?"

I looked at him and sighed "I told you; I don't have a girlfriend!"

"Well what is it that's making you so happy if it's not a girlfriend?" A big smile appeared on his face and he said in an even more teasing, sing-song voice; "Or is it a boyfriend?"

I felt a blush come up on my cheeks "n-no of course not!" I tired to deny, hoping that it sounded convincing. Unfortunately Kisa didn't seem to buy it.

"Really, Ricchan? I've noticed that you've been limping a little recently! Do you seriously not have a boyfriend?" he giggled and then added "is it Takano-san? I've noticed that you two seem close, and you were awfully _close_ to each other this morning!"

"What!?" I couldn't stop my reaction or the massive blush that appeared on my face "how'd you get that idea!?"

He shrugged "not like I care," he grinned at me "just curious about my kohai's love life that's all."

I shook my head, even when he was half asleep Kisa liked to tease me, it was unlikely that he knew anything about my relationship with our boss but still... I decided that I should change the subject and ask Kisa similar questions. "What about you?" I asked "you were limping a bit this morning and you said that a friend kept you up, don't tell me that _you_ have a boyfriend?"

I meant it purely as a joke but I noticed that a blush appeared on my senpai's face, "n-not at all!" he said, looking away from me. We were now outside and by the road, ready to cross. "I'm too old for that sort of thing anyway!"

I was beginning to get a little suspicious, he seemed to be protesting too much and I was about to call him out on it as we began to cross the road. Kisa had sped up and was a good bit in front of me, the road was clear... but not for long. Out of nowhere a car appeared, speeding and heading straight for Kisa. I thought and acted fast, adrenaline pumping though me. "KISA-SAN!" I shouted and quickly shoving him, sending him flying across the road where I saw him fall.

I then felt an intense pain in my stomach as the car hit me, sending me flying in the other direction. The headlights of the car were blinding and all I saw as I went down was the bright light. I hit the ground, the force causing my head to hit the road hard, very hard, the last thing I heard before I past out was Kisa yelling "RICCHAN!"

 **Kisa's P.O.V**

"RICCHAN!" I yelled again as I ran over to my friend, who was lying on his side on the road. Ignoring my own wounds I knelt down next to him and carefully rolled him onto his back, his eyes were closed and I panicked when I saw blood running down the side of his face from a large cut on his head. I was panicking and in shock but my body moved on it's own, following my instincts I placed my fingers on his neck, checking for a pulse, I felt some relief when I felt it, I then looked at his chest and was even more relieved when I saw it rise and fall. Good he has a pulse and he's breathing...

I looked up at the car that hit him, it had stopped and the driver and the passenger where staring at Ricchan with a look of pure shock. They looked young, too young to possibly have driver's licenses, which make me think that they were most likely joy riding.

In my shocked state, I sat there for a minute, not knowing what to do and panicking but then my brain and body synced up again and I pulled out my phone and called emergency services.

"Hello!" I said as soon as someone picked up "I need an ambulance! My friend was hit by a car! He's unconscious and bleeding from his head!"

"Okay, sir, please calm down," the women on the other end said "can you tell me you're location?"

I told her the street name and the other information she had asked for; Ricchan's and my name, his age, if he had health problems, what exactly happened etc. I waited by Ricchan's side, trying to get him to respond until the ambulance came.

Along with the ambulance there was a police car, the cops got out and were speaking with the kids in the car while the paramedics came over to us. One of them moving me away and getting me into the ambulance and the others putting Ricchan onto a stretcher and getting him into ambulance with me.

The ride in the ambulance was a blur, I was still in shock as the paramedic who got me into the ambulance looked me over. I was fine other than a couple of scrapes and a little bruising from being pushed out of the way.

Once I we got to the hospital, Ricchan was taken to see a doctor and I was told to wait in the waiting room. It was there that I thought that I should call Takano-san he'd be worried and as we had a lot of work to do so he'd probably be mad and wondering where the hell we were. I was about to call when the cops showed, wanting to get a statement from me about what happened. After they asked my name, employment and age (which I had to prove) they asked me about what happened and they then told me that the kids had indeed been joy riding and that charges would be pressed.

Once they were gone, I pulled out my phone, I really needed to call Takano-san to let him know what had happened. I couldn't get though; his phone was engaged; he was probably yelling at one of his poor mangaka or the printers. Annoyed I hung up and tried again a few minutes later, only to get the same result.

Feeling a little desperate I decided to call Hatori instead. Lucky he picked up on the first ring. "Yoshino!" he shouted quickly. "You better have you're manuscript done because if this is another call about-"

"Hatori, it's me," I said cutting him off.

"Kisa!?" He said shocked "where are you? Takano's getting really mad wondering where you two went off to!"

I was quite of a bit before I said "we're at the hospital..."

"What!? Why!?" he sounded alarmed "are you ok?"

"I'm fine and Ricchan will probably be fine too, it's just he was hit by a car, he saved me in fact, shoved me out of the way, but he's out cold and has a head injury."

"Hatori!?" I heard Takano-san shout in the background "is that Kisa? Where the hell is he?"

"Hospital!" Hatori replied, "Onodera was hit by a car!"

"WHAT!?" Was the very loud reply, "give me that! Kisa, where's Ritsu? Is he ok? What happened?" He sounded _very_ worried.

"The car came out of nowhere!" I told him, not thinking about how Takano-san had called Ricchan by his first name. "He pushed me out of the way and was hit himself. His head was bleeding and he was unconscious."

"Where about are you?" he asked "I'm coming right now!"

 **Takano's P.O.V**

I was panicking. I didn't know what to think. My lover was hit by a car, was bleeding from his head, was unconscious...

I assumed the worst. I didn't care about how Hatori and Mino tried to hold me back as I went running out of the office.

"Calm down!" Hatori called "I'm sure he'll be fine, we have work to do, you can't leave!"

"I don't care! I need to see him! I need to see Onodera!" I completely ignored their protests as I ran from the office and towards my car.

When I reached it, I was out of breath from running so fast and was leaning against it breathing hard, I coughed a little but recovered and got into my car. _Onodera, Onodera, Onodera!_ Was all that went though my head.

... That and a strange sense of Déjà vu...

* * *

I got to the hospital and saw Kisa sitting on one of the chairs, he was shaking and still looked like he was in shock. I saw that he had his phone to his ear. I slowed and took a deep breath before I walked up to him.

He saw me and quickly said to whoever he was talking with; "I'm fine! Okay? You don't need to worry so much! I should've known you'd overreact and I shouldn't have called... Yes, me too... Okay... Look my boss is here, I've gotta go... Bye... Yes... yes, me too, bye!" He hung up on whoever he was talking to and looked up at me a slight blush on his face.

"Is Onodera...?" I asked, I was so scared right now, I couldn't get a full sentence out.

Kisa shrugged, "dunno, I thought they would've come out to talk to me already but they haven't. I was under the impression it wasn't too bad, he had a pulse and was breathing but it worries me that they've not come out yet..."

My fear skyrocketed at the thought of losing him; I love him and Onodera just confessed to me, our relationship had just stared; I couldn't lose him now. I'd be left with too many regrets, I wouldn't be able to cope with losing my beloved again and this time for good...

Feeling useless, knowing there was nothing I could do I sat down on the chair next to Kisa with my head in my hands, trying not to let Kisa see how worried I was.

After a moment of silence Kisa spoke. "Did you call Ricchan's parents? They should be told about what happened to their son."

"Shit!" I sat up fast. In my worry I'd forgotten that Ritsu's parents would need to know and as his boss calling his emergency contacts was the first thing I should've done upon learning he'd be hospitalised. Pulling out my phone I called Hatori and asked him to call Onodera's parents as I didn't know their number and it should be listed on the list of my employee's emergency contacts.

I felt like I was making my feelings for Ritsu too obvious but I was so worried and the familiar feeling I had was confusing me, something like this had never happened so why, then did it feel like this had happened before? It was the feeling that Ritsu was going to die and there was nothing I could do about it...

Not long after a nurse came over to us and addressed Kisa. "Kisa Shouta right?" She asked. "You came here with Onodera Ritsu?"

He nodded and gestured to me, "He's our boss: Takano Masamune."

The nurse bowed to us and smiled. "Well Onodera-san will be okay. He stopped breathing while he was being treated but we managed to get him breathing again, he'll be fine. His neck was jerked so he has a neck brace and he was hit in the stomach but there's no internal injuries, it's just bruised. Our guess is that he stopped breathing due to a delayed shock. His brain is undamaged, the doctor does think, however, he'll have some memory loss but we think it'll just be a day or two. He won't remember the accident but that's probably for the best. You need to let him rest for now but he should be okay for visitors later."

I had never felt so relieved in my while life; my lover will be okay, thank god! I sat down with my head back letting out a big sigh.

Kisa and I stayed in the waiting room and eventually Ritsu's parents showed up. They insisted on seeing their son, despite the fact he was still unconscious. Eventually the doctor let them go and they went to his room, when they came back they thanked us and because I felt awkward waiting to see if Onodera woke up with his parents (especially since they thought I was just his boss) I deiced to leave, feeling less guilty when I was told he probably won't wake up until tomorrow.

I decided to drive Kisa home as he was still in shock and didn't want something else to happen to him on his way home. There was no way he'd be able to work being as shaken up as he was. I even walked him to the door and when he opened it he was glomped up a very tall, young guy with light brown hair. I looked at them with raised brows but didn't think too much into it, I was too concerned about Ritsu so even if I wanted to know more about this guy who clearly wasn't related to Kisa and was much younger than than him, that was seemingly living in his apartment but my mind was elsewhere.

The two bowed to me and thanked me and I bowed back before leaving to go home. Knowing that there was no way I'd sleep tonight and it wasn't because of work. Maybe I could get some done at home if I couldn't sleep anyway...


	2. Chapter 2

**Onodera's? P.O.V**

I felt myself coming into consciousness but I didn't open my eyes. My eyelids felt heavy and I just wanted to sleep a little more...

I thought. Or tried to, I quickly discovered that I didn't know anything. I didn't remember anything, not even my name or age...

I searched my memories trying to think of _anything._ Soon a memory came to me; I was in a room filled with odd machines, two other men were there with me. One was watching from the side, the other was staring at me with a look of amazement, I was holding out a Sakura branch to the man who was staring at me, he was very handsome and I... love him? Yes that's right, I love that guy...

"Well you know how last night's wind was really strong? When I went to look at the tress in our garden this morning, a part of a branch was broken off. I thought it might be good to grow. Since you like flowers so much, I'll give it to you." I said to him, blushing a bright red.

After that my memories came back all at once, Kuroda... The man that I love, the man that I hate to love... My own name what was it...? Oh yes; Tsukishima.

 **Correction, it's Tsukishima's P.O.V**

I remembered our childhood together, our life together. I remembered how he'd drive me mad, how he'd always have my favourite food, those chick buns, in his house even though he hated them. I remembered how he got sick waiting in line to get it, in the rain, that day I was forced to cancel our plans... I remembered our friend Seya. I remembered the battle...

The last time I saw Kuroda... we argued, he kissed me... I remember the desperate touches, the desperate kisses, how we wanted to hold and touch every part of each other's bodies. To burn it into memory. I had loved him and yet I never said it. He never said it to me...

The next day while Kuroda slept, I sneaked out... Dressed in white, I went to end my life; to commit seppuku. I had volunteered but I didn't want to... I knew that I had no choice and that it would be easier to just go quietly. I did it to save our lord, our clan... I did it to save Kuroda...

I knelt in front of our lord and other men. I set my death poem on the ground, I took off the top of my robe and reached for the knife... The pain was intense as I shoved it into my stomach and opened it but I thought of Kuroda, of my love and it dulled the pain a little... Then there was a sudden and quick pain in my neck as one of the best swordsman cut off my head...

That's right. I died, I'm dead, I'll never see Seya or Kuroda again... We'd never go flower viewing together again like I had hoped we would...

I squeezed my eyes shut; I didn't want to open them, I didn't want to see what the afterlife looked like because Kuroda wasn't there.

I began to feel the pain, my stomach hurt where I had cut it open, my neck where my head was severed also hurt. My head was also painful and I involuntarily groaned in agony.

All I wanted right now was to see Kuroda even if it was just for five minutes...

As my senses started to get sharper as I became more awake. I began to hear a beeping noise, it was a little annoying but I ignored it, I didn't want to open my eyes; I just wanted to stop existing.

The beeping didn't stop, it just got louder and more annoying and as much as I didn't want to open my eyes and face reality, I wanted the annoying sound to stop so I slowly opened my eyes...

Bright.

Too bright.

I closed my eyes again and opened again, blinking to try to get used to the light. Once I was used to it, I looked around, the room I was in was white and filled with odd machines I'd never seen before, they were weirder than the ones Kuroda used to make his silly dolls...

I tried to turn my neck but I found that I couldn't, there was something around it stopping my movement. This defiantly wasn't what I thought the afterlife would be like. I managed to sit up despite the pain in my stomach and I reached up to rub my eyes. That's when I found some weird mask covering my mouth and nose. Frowning, I removed it. What the hell is this odd place?

"Oh! Onodera-san!" A woman in odd clothes came running towards me. I looked around wondering if there was someone else in the room with me but there was no one. Was she talking to me...?

"It's good that you're awake!" She said smiling at me and taking the mask thing from me and putting it back on my face "you might not need this now but you should really keep it on until the doctor tells you otherwise."

Feeling awkward and confused I asked her with my throat dry and voice hoarse; "where am I?"

"You're in the hospital, you where hit by a car after you pushed your friend out of the way. Kisa-san was his name, I believe. You don't need to worry about him, he's fine. Your parents are really worried about you, we'll give them a call after the doctor has seen to you. I'll go get him." She smiled at me and left the room.

I was even more confused now; what's a car? Who's Kisa-san? I don't know anyone called Kisa-san. What did she mean by my parents being worried? They would be proud right? Their son saved the clan... And who is Onodera? She called me Onodera-san but that's not my name...

I looked over to the side having to turn my whole body to do so and saw a mirror, I was also in weird clothes and my hair... It was shorter, a lot shorter but other than that I looked the same. What the hell is going on here!?

A tall man soon came into the room, he was also in weird clothes and was smiling kindly at me. "Onodera-san," he smiled as he sat in a chair next to the bed I was on "I'm Doctor Kusama Nowaki." He greeted with a huge smile and asked, "how do you feel? Any pain anywhere?"

I looked at the man and slowly spoke "my stomach, neck and head hurts." Doctor Kusama nodded his head and I continued "I'm also very confused..."

He gave me a sympathetic look "yes, we figured you may have some memory loss. It was quite a head injury. What was the last thing you remember, Onodera-san?"

I hesitated, was it really a good idea to tell him? He was calling me by a different name and everything around me was weird, it didn't feel right... I shrugged and said "I don't know."

Doctor Kusama looked shocked "do you remember anything? Your first name for example?"

I wanted to tell him that my name is Tsukishima but it felt like that wasn't the answer to his question. "No..." I whispered.

The doctor sighed "this isn't good... You're name is Onodera Ritsu," he told me but it didn't ring any bells. "Do you remember any facts? Your job? The names of your friends or your boss or your parents... The year?"

"No... I-I don't remember anything..." I lied feeling like the life I remember wasn't the one I was meant to...

"Well I don't know much about you but I can tell you what I do know," Doctor Kusama said still looking at me with sympathy, he then answered all the questions he asked me. "The friend who came here with you was Kisa Shouta, your boss showed up later, he was _very_ worried about you. His name was Takano Masamune. You're an editor at Marukawa Publishing in the Shojo manga department called Emerald. The year is 2016. Does thing ring any bells for you?"

"Not really," I replied, trying to hide my shock. It all meant nothing to me; the names he said, my employment. But what had me so shocked was the year, 2016... I died in the year 1868... It was 148 years into the future...

I thought a little more; my name was different, I looked the same but my hair was shorter (probably because of the fashion of this time.) I appeared to have a life... Was I reincarnated...?

My thoughts went straight to Kuroda; was he also reincarnated? If he was I had to find him! This could be my chance to be with him! We could live together and I would no longer have all these regrets...

I didn't want to stay here but Doctor Kusama told me I needed rest. My stomach was badly bruised, I had pulled a muscle in my neck and because of my head injury and amnesia they wanted me to stay where they could monitor me for a bit. The cut itself wasn't that bad and I had a gauze over it.

I was told to sleep and later a man and a women came to see me. Apparently they were my parents but I didn't recognise them at all. They hugged me and cried and I tried to comfort them but in the end they were nothing but strangers to me. I felt really bad for them, this must be hard for them...

After they left, I slept again and in the evening the nurse came in and told me that my boss had come to visit me and to ask me if I was okay to see him. I told her it was okay and she left. I was really curious to see what my boss was like, back in my old life I was a minster meaning that there wasn't many people above me and I answered to my lord. I was used to being the boss of others so it'd be weird to have a boss myself. I did think that it would be nice, however, as I never really liked being in charge, it just wasn't for me. I worked so hard just to prove Kuroda wrong, to show him that I could do it. Even though I loved him, he was a huge asshole...

Now I really miss Kuroda and our stupid arguments. I really wanted to see if I could find him. I really needed to see him, to hear him, to smell him... to touch him and taste him...

 _Knock._

 _Knock._

 _Knock._

"Come in!" I called. This would be my boss. I turned to face the door wondering what the man would look like. The door opened, slowly, too slowly, but once it was open a tall man with black hair, like mine it was shorter, and he had a rough expression on his handsome face as he walked in.

I froze in shock. It was him! I didn't have to look for him! He was here, holding some flowers... "Kuroda!" I was so happy, that I didn't think and blurted out his name and was ready to jump into his arms but I stopped when I saw the hurt, heartbroken look on his face that appeared when I called him Kuroda...

Oh, yeah, didn't the doctor tell me that my boss's name was Takano Masamune... whoops. It made sense; I had a different name so Kuroda would too and if it was the accident that caused me to remember the past, then Kuroda, or Takano as he was called now, wouldn't remember...

"Onodera?" he asked, "who's Kuroda?"

 **Takano's P.O.V**

I was confused and hurt at what Onodera had said. When I got a call from the doctor telling me that Onodera had total amnesia I had panicked. My love forgot me, again. Once again I'd have to make him fall in love with me and right after he finally, _finally_ said it...

I was hurt and I had been ready to leave the office once I told everyone but we had so much work especially that Kisa and I hadn't gotten much done last night and with Onodera in the hospital. They all managed to convince me to stay and work for a while and let Onodera rest and try to remember things.

Kisa was clearly feeling guilty and was very quiet as he worked. Just before I left to go see Onodera, Kisa had apologised to me too many times to count and promised to visit Onodera himself when he had a chance to.

I had felt a little better knowing that I would see Onodera and I was hopeful that if he saw me, some memories might come back and when I saw how happy he looked when I came in, I had thought he remembered me but he said another man's name. Kuroda... I didn't know who that was, Onodera had never mentioned him before. Maybe he was a lover he had in the ten years we spent apart, one that maybe looked like me, one he loved more than me?

I was hurt and painfully jealous. I, his lover, shows up to see him in hospital and his mistakes me for someone else. Did he ever love me at all...

Trying to stay calm (after all he was recovering in hospital,) I asked him who Kuroda was. He stayed quite and turned back to face away from me, he was blushing and looked really guilty.

When he didn't say anything I asked again, more firmly; "Onodera! Who is Kuroda!?"

He jumped and still not looking at me he said "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that..."

"Tell me who he is, Onodera!" I put the flowers I had brought him down and put my hands on his shoulders and turned him to face me "do you remember anything? Do you remember me? I'm your lover, Onodera and if you are cheating on me or still in love with an old lover I want to know!"

He looked at me with wide eyes, he looked like he was about to cry. "You're so mean!" He sobbed, "I don't remember you as Takano or whatever the doctor said your name is!"

I narrowed my eyes "who's Kuroda!?" I asked again, I would ask it as many times as needed until he answered me.

"If I tell you, you'll think I'm mad!" He cried.

"Oh really? Onodera please, who the fuck is Kuroda!?"

"He's you!" He shouted at me.

I blinked in confusion "eh?" What the hell did he mean by that?

"He's you! How could you forget!? Kuroda! How could you? You're the worst!"

"What? Onodera? My name's Takano Masamune, it used to be Saga Masamune. You're the one who forgot everything!" I was so confused right now, Onodera must have hit his head harder than the doctors thought.

"But I've remembered our past life!" Onodera announced "you were Kuroda and I was Tsukishima! I had to commit seppuku and I left you all alone! But now we can be together, you stupid asshole!"

"Ritsu... Are you sure you did hit your head harder than the doctors think?" I asked, "or maybe they put you on some weird drug?" This was too weird. I didn't believe in things like past lives and what Onodera was saying just seemed too crazy. I felt the need to sit down and sat in the chair next to his bed.

"Huh?" He looked hurt and desperate.

"I don't know where this came from but are you sure you just didn't have some strange hallucination while you were out? Maybe when you hit your head, you remembered the plot of some book you read, or a movie or TV drama you saw in the past that you really liked and thought it was your life? You know, like your memories got mixed up." I really doubted what he was saying to me. There has to be something wrong with his brain...

"No, Kuroda please believe me!" he suddenly grabbed my hands and stared at me intensely. "After everything we've been though I just want to..." He trailed off.

I tiled my head to the side curiously "Ritsu? ...You ok?"

"I'm fine, just I think I need a moment..." he said shrinking down into himself. He then added quietly in a mere whisper "and my name's Tsukishima not Ritsu."

Sighing I stood up and picked up the flowers I brought for him and held them out for him to take. "Here these are for you. I don't know if you like flowers or whatever but it's normal to bring the sick flowers so... get well soon, Ritsu."

He looked up at me his eyes wide in surprise, he looked more surprised than I thought he would be and he just asked; "your giving me flowers?" When I nodded he took them and quietly muttered "thanks."

There was an awkward feeling in the air now, feeling the need to say or do something, I put my hand on his head and messed up his hair as I petted him. "I hope you get your memories back. We need you back at work, Onodera. That and I think Kisa's feeling a bit guilty. When he comes to see you, I hope you don't go weird on him." With that I walked away.

Before I closed the door I looked back at him. He was sitting there starring at the flowers I gave him. He was being really weird... I wanted Onodera Ritsu back, I don't want this... Tsukishima...

Even though, I felt dumb doing it when I went back to the office and after I answered the questions on how Onodera was doing (I left out the weird memories he had.) I sat at my desk and decided to Google 'Tsukishima and Kuroda' to see if I could find something on them.

I had expected to find some novel or movie or something that they were characters in but what I found out was that they were real people who lived almost 150 years ago. Tsukishima was a young minister who had to commit seppuku to save his clan and his lord, he saved a lot of people... Kuroda was a soldier under him who had, after the war, isolated himself and made dolls that could move and talk and had feelings if given love from their owners.

Feeling curious and slightly afraid that Onodera really was remembering things from a past life I Googled 'hybrid child.' What I found shocked me. The first one, the prototype was said to have been modelled after Tsukishima, according to the website I was on he had been Kuroda's childhood friend who died and that he did it to honour his memory but I couldn't help but feel there was more to it than that...

Reading on I learned that the hybrid children no longer excised. When Kuroda had died, people had tried to find some kind of instructions for making more hybrid children but he had never written them down and he had turned down all offers of making factories and turning it into a big business, he had passed on the secret to no one and he had no children or next of kin. The hybrid children died with him as there was no one else who could make them. The living ones died out and no matter how much they were investigated no one could figure it out. They died out and were forgotten...

Even though this was the first I heard of it, it felt familiar, like I should know all of this already, like I had lived it... Was what Onodera said really true...?


	3. Chapter 3

**Tsukishima's P.O.V**

After Kuroda... Takano left, I sat and looked at the flowers he brought me. The way he held them out to me reminded me of the way I gave him the Sakura branch all those years ago...

Setting the flowers on the table, I made a metal note to ask for water for them next time a nurse or doctor came to see me.

I sighed I knew that I should sleep but my thoughts were all over the place. After what had happened with Ku- with Takano, I had a lot to think about. Knowing that he was my boss and my lover in this life might make things awkward between us after what I said to him. For once I wished we were just friends this would make things a little easier...

Unable to sleep and with nothing to do I sat on the bed and did nothing but think and worry for the next few hours, until a nurse came in and offered me food saying that I should eat something. I ate what I was given and then went back to thinking about what to do about Takano, not only would I have to deal with him but also learn about modern technology and learn about my job...

Later on in the evening there was a knock on my door. I told the person to come in and the door opened reviling a small guy with black hair and a big smile on his face, he was carrying a bag who looked to be around 14. I wondered why a kid would come to visit me alone, no one said anything about me knowing any kids and with my amnesia it didn't seem like it'd be a good idea to let a kid see me alone. Therefore I assumed he was lost or confused about the room numbers.

But that didn't seem to be the case; he seemed to recognise me and slowly walked up to me. "Hi, Ricchan... How are you feeling?" he asked. I tried not to frown, should a kid really be addressing someone older by a nickname...?

I felt awkward. I didn't want to insult him but I really had no idea who he was... I gave him a blank look and said quietly "em, sorry but er well... who are you?" Damn it that was really awkward! But I guess I'll have to do that again with other people I 'knew' at least this kid probably knew about my amnesia as he was visiting me in hospital...

"Oh, sorry," he said, suddenly losing the smile. "I really didn't want to believe Takano-san when he said you have amnesia, no one did, but I guess I'll have to introduce myself again... I'm Kisa Shouta. I was with you when you were hit by the car."

Wait! This is the guy I was with...? But I was told that Kisa-san was my coworker and senpai... this guy's a teenager... right? "Really?" I felt even more awkward now for not believing him. Maybe he was just a kid who thought it was funny to pay jokes on amnesiacs...

He rolled his eyes like he was expecting my reaction and put his hand into his jacket pocket and pulled out a card and handed it to me. I looked at it and saw his photo on it as well as the works 'Driver's license' along with other information, including his date of birth...

"YOU'RE 31?!" I couldn't help my reaction and it came out unexpectedly... I quickly covered my mouth with my hands and bit my lip. That was embarrassing... Takano could have warned me about this when he said Kisa was coming to visit me. Now I look like an idiot.

Kisa, however, just laughed. "Yeah, I am. Honestly Ricchan, your shocked and embarrassed expressions never fails to make me laugh. I take it you are feeling better now?" he asked me.

"Yeah, I guess. I'm still a bit sore but they gave me painkillers. They told me that I was lucky to get away with all these smaller injuries. It could've been worse if the car hadn't slowed down. I still can't remember anything though."

Kisa sighed and sat in the chair next to me. "I'm really sorry, Ricchan; if I had been watching what I was doing you wouldn't have had to push me out of the way..."

Suddenly feeling guilty myself, not only for making Kisa feel guilty but also for not being able to properly tell him it wasn't his fault as I couldn't remember what happened... Still I had to try; "You don't need to apologise. I'm sure it wasn't your fault. At least you aren't hurt as well."

Kisa just nodded and looked down. This was clearly not the best topic but I didn't remember him so I didn't know what kind of conversations we had before so I didn't know what to say to him. Lucky Kisa broke the silence, "Takano-san asked me to bring some old manuscripts with me and to show you the basics of editing if you are feeling up to it. It might be good to get your mind off things and we really need you back as soon as possible. Who knows, it might even jog your memory a little. What do you say? Want to give it a go?"

I thought for a moment, it would be a good idea to learn about my job and I didn't really want to learn from Takano, it'd be too awkward after what I told him, not to mention I wasn't liking the idea that _Kuroda_ of all people would teach me something I was suppose to already know. Although I don't remember Kisa he seemed nice and he did feel familiar like he was a friend of mine so I agreed.

It was surprisingly easy and the more we spoke about it the more I felt memories returning. Although these memories where just work related. I didn't remember people just... how to do my job. I didn't remember events but I seemed to remember the plot of a manga that I had, according to Kisa, edited.

It wasn't long before Kisa gave me the manuscript that was to be edited next, he watched me work just in case I needed any help but I got most of it done myself. I was surprised, I guess I hadn't completely forgotten Onodera Ritsu's life... my life... He was still in there, somewhere. That brought some hope with it, I just hoped I would remember my new life and my old one.

Kisa had to leave not long after but he left the manuscripts I had to edit with me. It gave me something to do other than lay around all day and I was glad for the activity. Kisa told me to write down why I made the changes so someone could explain it to the mangaka. We all agreed it was best if I didn't contact my mangaka for now simply so I wouldn't be awkward with them as I had forgotten them and it would be unprofessional and a waste of valuable time for me to have to get to know them again.

Nothing really happened for the next few days. I past the time editing manuscripts, quickly becoming used to it as I had Onodera's knowledge of just his work. The doctor and nurses came to check up on me periodically. The only visitors I had were my parents and sometimes Kisa who came to give me more work and to take away the stuff I had completed as well as giving me pointers and advise for the things I had forgotten. I also quickly discovered that Kisa liked to tease me but that wasn't a bad thing, it felt familiar and made me feel less lonely and more at home in this new time period.

Takano never came back to see me until I was discharged from the hospital. He came to pick me up. I felt awkward with him, I wanted to hug him and kiss him after having gone and died on him but I felt that'd be inappropriate; he didn't remember.

When I got out, he acted normal greeting me and asking me how I felt. We left after Doctor Kusama told us what I'd need to do and when I should come in for a check up and what to do if I had any symptoms that were on a list he gave us. Takano had his car and I got in it without saying anything and he drove off.

"You live next door to me," Takano explained, breaking the awkward silence. I nodded and he continued, "I did consider telling you that you live with me but I thought it'd be best if I tell you the truth and let you go to your own apartment. It might help you to remember."

"Why would you want to tell me that I live with you?" I asked, curious.

"Because, every time I ask you to move in with me you say no. I really want to live with you..."

I moved my head to look out of the window, it was much easier now I didn't have a neck brace. "Then Onodera's an idiot. After what happened, I don't really want to be apart from you." I blushed while telling him honestly, knowing that, that was a problem in our past life, we should have told each other the truth.

I glanced over at him, he had stopped at a light and he looked at me with raised eyebrows. "So you and I were lovers in our past life?" he asked casually. He didn't really seem curious and it didn't feel like he even belived me, it felt more like he was just humouring me.

"Not exactly," I muttered. I didn't really want to talk about this, I felt awkward. "We were childhood friends and we always fought. You'd do something to piss me off, like teasing me or calling me stupid or making dolls that looked like me and I'd tell you to go die and then I'd hit you. It wasn't until after the battle, the night before I died that you... well..."

"I confessed?" Takano asked. Facing the front moving on as the lights changed colour.

"No, not really. We argued and you kissed me and we, well, had sex but neither of us confessed and I left before you woke up in the morning." There was an awkward silence after that. I deiced that I should know more about my new life so in order to brake out of the awkwardness I asked, "so how did we meet in this life?"

At my question Takano grinned. "You stalked me at the school library."

I looked at Takano in shock. Did I really...?

He laughed at me before he went on. "You even went as far as to lie about your name on the library cards. Then you came straight out and said you loved me. We dated for a bit then you misunderstood something and left me. Ten years later you ended up working for me and it took me ages to get you to fall in love with me again and then you finally say it and now you've forgotten again!" He seemed to have gotten angrier and angrier as he want on.

"I'm sorry," I apologised "but I do love you. I don't remember this life but you're still Kuroda and I really wish I had told you how I felt about you..."

"It's not the same, Ritsu. Even if I was Kuroda, I'm Takano now. It's a different life with different experiences. I'm sure there is a great deal of differences between me and Kuroda."

I wanted to disagree with him but I knew that there was probably some truth in what he said; part of what make Kuroda, Kuroda was what he went through in life and even if Takano is his reincarnation his life would've played out differently so without some experiences he wasn't the same person.

I had to face it; I don't know Takano...

The rest of the journey home was in silence and when we got to our apartments, Takano pointed to mine and disappeared into his own. I sighed and went into mine. I got the feeling like he didn't want to be near me, it probably made him depressed after all he clearly loves Onodera and I've forgotten everything...

I looked around my home but it didn't really feel all that familiar to me. I thought that since I remembered a good bit of manga editing that I would at least remember my home once I saw it but it was just some strange place to me. I walked around all the rooms to find out what each one was. I had learned a great deal about modern technology so I knew what everything was but it still felt alien to me.

Once I had a good look at my home and things I sat down on the sofa. I had no idea what I was meant to do, I could pick up one of those books that I had or turn on the TV but I didn't really feel like doing that... There was so much going on and for the first time it really hit me, not only did Kuroda think I'm mad but I was in a different time period, things were westernised, there was no samurai, Japan was open to the world and there was so much new things and all I really remembered was things from almost 150 years ago, things that might not even exist anymore. Just getting with the times was going to be hard...

I sat for several hours feeling overwhelmed by everything and having no idea about what to do when there was a knock at my door. I assumed that it was Takano coming to tell me something or check up on me so I went to the door and opened it.

But instead of Takano standing there was a large bear of a man who looked really pissed off. The energy he was giving off almost made me want to run inside and lock my door but I stayed strong. I was a minster, a warrior, I wasn't about to cower in fear.

The man pushed me inside and shut the door quickly. He was glaring down at me, if looks could kill I'd have been dead on the spot. I had no idea who this was or what I'd done to piss him off but he must be someone I know, right?

"You." He stated "is it true?"

"Huh?" I looked up at him feeling very confused and a little intimidated.

"You've forgotten Masamune again!?"

I glared back at him, there was no way I'd let some rude jerk scare me off. "When someone has amnesia they do indeed forget people. I don't even remember my own parents! I also have no idea who you are so I'd appreciate it if you'd leave."

"My name's Yokozawa Takafumi. I told you that if you _ever_ hurt Masamune again, I'd make you pay! I went to see him, I just left, he's super depressed and just because I don't love him like I did before it doesn't mean that he's not an important friend and you hurt him again." He grabbed me up the collar of my shirt and pushed me to the wall.

I was ready to fight back if it came to that, I had my pride and I wasn't afraid to hit someone who pissed me off, Kuroda knew that well. I may not know this Yokozawa but he seemed like a real jerk. "Well excuse me for getting into an accident!" I said sarcastically.

"You think just because you don't remember you can be a cheeky little shit, huh?" Yokozawa growled. "It's not really you're fault so I'll let you off." He let me go with a push and stepped back while straightening his suit. "I'm came here to tell you that you better be considerate of Masamune's feelings and not hurt him and you better remember things soon because I can't take care of him like I did the last time. I have someone now and he's enough work as it is." With that Yokozawa went to the door and reached for the handle.

Before he left I stopped him "I won't hurt Takano." I stated. Part of me wanted to blurt out that, that was because Takano is Kuroda but the last thing I needed was people thinking that I'm insane. Especially if they're coworkers or people who I come in contact with regularly, this Yokozawa must be one of those things...

Yokozawa just huffed. "You better not. Get better soon, Onodera for Masamune and then do whatever you can to make him happy. I can't stand to see him hurt." With that he opened the door, left and slammed it shut, leaving me stunned and wondering what that guy's problem was.


End file.
